Tuesday, 16 October 2012

Settling the Score with a Chocolate Muffin

Mystery, intrigue, suspense... all of these are captured in this single photo. Yes, it's a photo of a muffin paper... but that only builds up even more tension.

You may only see a muffin paper... but, that is actually not the focus. You're actually being mislead my focusing on the muffin paper. The question you should ask yourself is not "Why am I looking at a muffin paper?" No, the real question you should ask yourself is, "What happened to the muffin?"

Clearly, this should be something addressed in a detective novel and to be honest, I don't know why someone hasn't thought of addressing this issue in a book by now. It has all the makings of a detective novel. It could be called something like "The Case of the Missing Muffin." 

What is this photo telling us? Well, let's look at the evidence captured within the photo and deduce what happened...

hmm... this photo is telling the story of an individual who most likely had a score to settle with someone and their weapon of choice to settle that score, was a chocolate muffin. I know what you're thinking, "Wait, seriously... just a chocolate muffin?" No, this was no ordinary chocolate muffin. It was actually a chocolate chip chocolate muffin. 

Now that we know that the chocolate muffin had chocolate chips in it as well, we know that we are now dealing with a sinister individual. Judging by the lighting, the incident took place sometime in the afternoon. Which means the victim of this tragedy was no where near the scene at the time all this took place. 

You can see this was pre-meditated... he took his time to carry out his revenge. Wait, how do we know that the individual is a man? Well think about it, it's more likely that a male would eat someone else's food without permission than a female. Seriously, it's clearly a male we're sealing with. 

All the pieces of this puzzle are almost in place... just a few more pieces. Look at the table. Wait do you not see? You don't see any dirt. Look at how clean that table is. When he ate this chocolate muffin, he took his time. Yes, he must have enjoyed every chocolatey bite... the chocolate chips probably melted in his mouth. 

This man knew the victum very well. Since it was afternoon, this man must have known exactly where the victim would be. If he didn't not, he would not have taken his time... and when you eat a chocolate muffin, you want to take your time. If you want to eat a muffin in a rush, then go eat a bran muffin. Chocolate on the other hand, should be enjoyed. 

We also know a little about the victim. The victim have have looked forward to this chocolate muffin. Why else would the muffin be the man's tool for revenge. It was probably a muffin that can't be bought from a nearby shop. Furthermore, it must have been a damn delicious chocolate muffin in order for him to save it for later. 

Notice how the man placed the empty muffin paper in the open, where it can be easily spotted. He wanted the victim to see that someone had eaten his muffin. But he was smart not to leave any evidence to link him to the crime. The victum could suspect him, but couldn't prove anything. Oh yes, this is one slippery basta- um, I mean, a slippery individual.

Let's sum up what we have leant:
  • It was done by a man
  • He knew the victim well
  • He ate someone else's chocolate chip muffin during the afternoon
  • It was most likely done out of revenge
hmm... I guess that's all we know.

But we still don't know who the victim is or what the victim did to him. We don't know anything concrete about the individual or his personality. We that he acted out of spite or revenge, but this could be anyone. Actually, now that I think about it, it could also be a prank as a result of someone's sick sense of humour. So, in other words... we don't actually no anything. oh well.

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